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Xerobot

by Xerobot

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  • Record/Vinyl + Digital Album

    Edition of 140. All on reclaimed/recycled vinyl. The stampers were damaged during this edition, so we don't expect a repress. This is it. Sleeves individually assembled at Chunklet HQ. 20 page booklet featuring an extensive oral history of the band and......lyrics!

    Includes unlimited streaming of Xerobot via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    ships out within 1 day
    Purchasable with gift card

      $19.99 USD or more 

     

  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    Purchasable with gift card

      $10 USD  or more

     

  • Limited Edition 12" Vinyl
    Record/Vinyl + Digital Album

    Edition of 180. Sixty each on red, clear and black. Sleeves individually assembled at Chunklet HQ. 20 page booklet featuring an extensive oral history of the band and......lyrics! A sticker is also included.

    Includes unlimited streaming of Xerobot via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

    Sold Out

  • Limited Edition 12" Vinyl Repressing
    Record/Vinyl + Digital Album

    Was kind of taken by surprise how those first copies flew out the door, so we decided to make another batch. Different color vinyl just for you dorks out there. Edition of 120.

    Includes unlimited streaming of Xerobot via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

    Sold Out

  • Record/T-shirt Bundle - ONE DAY OFFER
    Record/Vinyl + Digital Album

    In honor of Bandcamp Friday, maybe we can sell a ton of this. Record on green vinyl and a Xerobot shirt. Shirt on Gildan Hammer blanks. Save a few bucks.

    Includes unlimited streaming of Xerobot via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

    Sold Out

1.
Ooooh... Messing with the galley is my Personal Locater I only get to fire with the gun Ding Dumb, I always wanna get some It must just be the fire in the night I think about it, the fire in the night Burning of the bell, oooh... I only get to fire with the gun Ding Dumb, I always wanna get some It must just be the fire in the night Would it be the galley in the fire, beep beep Oh yes, it's my Personal Locater Ayiyiyiyiyiyi It gives me my super powers, oooh... And now I feel so sad and lonely Without my Personal Locator Got a little grain elevator Ding Ding Dumb, I always wanna get some It might just be the fire in the night Aaaarghghgh,wowowowowowowo
2.
Lil Pudgy 00:34
Call him Lil Pudgy Said he dropped a fudgy Waaargh Call him Lil Pudgy Said he dropped a fudgy Oh Oh! Call him Lil Pudgy Said he dropped a fudgy Ooooh... Everyone has their own form of paraphanelia But I maintain, mine is a work of art When you see a child do a pissy, pat it's head Oooh Oooh Oooh Rllll! Rllll! Rllll! Mr Poppers Penguins I have a lot of little animals I keep in my basement I have to buy very many bags of ice They came and they went, oh! Mr Poppers Penguins, oooooooooh! Mr Poppers Penguins, rrrrrrrrrgh Ice cube, basement!
3.
4.
Tally Ho 01:30
a bit more than the standard meritocracy Time to get out of bed, put your shoes on Gilly in a bow! Tally Ho, with a Gilly in the bay Tally Ho, with a really in a riddle bay Comes a time when you need Just a bit more than the standard meritocracy I'm a little bitty man My vision of the world is so so small Gonna give it all up, let's go, With a go first tell del ridio urrgh! urrgh! urrgh! urrgh! Aw! There comes a time when you need Just a bit more than the standard meritocracy Time to get out of bed, put your shoes on Gilly in a bow! Tally Ho, in a Gilly in the bay Tally Ho, with a really in a riddle bay Comes a time when you need A bit more than the standard meritocracy I'm a little bitty man My vision of the world is so so small Gonna give it all up, let's go With a go first tell del ridio Aaaaargh We need more than the standard meritocracy!
5.
Whisper 01:43
This song is written in the form of a whisper A return to the bourgeois sloganeering of my youth Oh, well, how about that? There will be no return to reactionary recidivism But as my co-worker Mark says The future of the world is on the Nile. Inch by inch Drop by drop A return to glorious moral obliquity x2 oooooo, ah ah ah! whaaaa! oooooo, ah ah ah! whaaaa! oooooo oooooo oooooo oooooo! Well there you have it, a little bitty Whisper A return to the bourgeois sloganeering of my youth Oh, how about that? oooooo, ah ah ah! whaaaa! Inch by inch Drop by drop A return to glorious moral obliquity
6.
Wrustle 00:45
A small boy No arms, no legs Sitting in a pile of leaves What is he called? What is he called? Aaaaaarrrrrgh! Call him little pudgy boy, playing with a cow Call him little tradgedy Wrustle! Wrustle! A small boy Sitting in a pile of leaves No arms, no legs What is he called? What is he called?
7.
D-Con 01:13
Desimone Desimone D-Con D-Con A desimone D-Con all the way Desimone Desimone D-Con D-Con A desimone D-Con all the way I don't know why, I didn't pay off The little bitty phone bill Whoo! Oh dear And now I'm in trouble with the fat man Aaaah, it's execution time Desimone Desimone D-Con D-Con A desimone D-Con all the way Desimone Desimone D-Con D-Con A desimone D-Con all the way I don't know why, I didn't pay off The little bitty phone bill Whoo! Oh dear And now I'm in trouble with the fat man Aaaah, it's execution time It all goes in a spiral I have enemies everywhere Mutt and Jeff x7 Oooooh! Desimone Desimone D-Con D-Con A desimone D-Con all the way Desimone Desimone D-Con D-Con A desimone D-Con all the way I don't know why, I didn't pay off The little bitty phone bill Whoo! Oh dear And now I'm in trouble with the fat man Aaaah, it's execution time
8.
This Is Bill 00:59
Digging for apples Digging for apples is the greatest thing And Bill was always just an apple boy combopulator He loves the dirt and sweat in his mouth But with a real ass kick It always sends him flying This is Bill x3 Itty bitty ooooh! Bow wow ridobe Scary boy go woooooo! Apple boy catastrophe Go get fucked up Oh! Oh! lalalalalalalalala ah ah aha! Bow wow ridobe Scary boy go woooooo! Apple boy catastrophe Go get fucked up
9.
The Warning 01:27
Uhhhhhhrrrrrr Warning, Beware Beware Beware Beware of the shoe shine boys That are killing in a time by killing their family Oooooooh! Aaaaaaa! Goodie old time, Goodie old time We're all gonna have really good little time Warning We're all gonna have a really old time Warning, Beware Beware Beware Beware of the shoe shine boys That are killing in a time by killing their family Oooooooh! Aaaaaaa! Goodie old time, Goodie old time We're all gonna have really good little time Warning We're all gonna have a really old little time You have every reason to fear and despise All the killing of time by little pigs They'll do the same to you, AaaaaaaaaUhhhhhr! You see those who make so much more money than you and you want to kill them, and I don't blame you AaaaaaaaaUhhhhhr! Awwww! Uhhhhhr! Uhhhhhr! Beware of the shoe shine boys That are killing in a time by killing their family Oooooooh! Aaaaaaa! Goodie old time, Goodie old time We're all gonna have a really old little time Aaaaaugh! Wuhhhhr! Everyone be good now, ta ta.
10.
I've been looking at a flower Looking at a flower I bet a little bit ago Why will I die when I'm looking at you? Too Tough to Paint What you gonna say? What the fuck are you gonna do? I'm friends with little bitty pals Little bitty pals I'm friends with little bitty pals Why will I die when I'm looking at you? Too Tough to Paint What will you say? What will you fucking do? I've got a problem It's with your little paint box I've got a problem with no account shits Always trying to tell me what to do Argh Argh Argh Argh But we're too tough to paint We're too tough to paint We're too tough to paint We'retootoughtopaint We're too tough to paint We're too tough to paint We're too tough todododododo
11.
Song One 00:50
A pretty kitty is something to behold Pretty little kitty is a high five centerfold Tie it in a bowtie! Killing time And all of the kittens in the world Make time worth killing I feel so silly when I have to sleep alone Pretty little kitty is a fi ri rigamo Tie it in a bowtie! Oh my kitty piggy Oh kitty, aaaaargh! I hate to tie you up and go Pretty little kitty is a wild ride rainbow aaaaargh, oooh...
12.
Wo-Wo-Wo 00:32
I get the golly of the peppermint tree With a bop and a bop and really go kind of go Golly of the peppermint tree Waaaaaaaa! You know, we're the Gollipops With the golly of the peppermint tree With a bop and a bop and really go kind of go Golly of the peppermint tree A a a a a a a a a a a a!
13.
I Forced Him 02:12
I forced an old old man To eat a little chicken sandwich I don't think he liked it very much And his arms began to go to his legs And he wanted to breathe I do not think he cared for it all that much Aaaah Old Old Man Aaaah Little Chicken Sandwich I am the Old Old Man I am the Little Chicken Sandwich I forced an old old man To eat a little chicken sandwich I don't think he liked it very much As I lashed his arms behind his back And he wanted to breathe Well I don't seem to categorize these things But I remember When he was my daddy And the things he would do Ahhhhhhhhh daddy daddy, do you remember me? Remember me I'm a big boy now! I'm gonna kill you! A little chicken sandwich A little chicken sandwich I forced an old man To eat a little chicken sandwich Uhhhhhhhhhrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr Ak! Ak! Ak!
14.
Bathysphere 01:08
Time has come, descend to the bathysphere You punch the clock, you're doing your time Time has come, descend to the bathysphere You punch the clock, you're doing your time You're going down, six feet under The rooms are guarded with elected murderers You have a chair, and it's a comfy chair Read a book, all you need, aaaaaah! Time has come, descend to the bathysphere You punch the clock, you're doing your time Time has come to descend to the bathysphere Punching in the clock When you're doing your time You're going down, six feet under The chairs are bolted to the floor You have a chair, and it's a comfy chair Read a book, all you need, aaaaaah! Bathysphere We're going down Bathysphere, going to where we get it down You're going down, six feet under There is a doorway, leads to a room You have a chair, and it's a comfy chair Read a book, bla bla bla, aaaaaah!
15.
Genotype 00:53
I like to fall down Ehhhhhrrrrr Woooooo! I like to fall down Ehhhhhrrrrr Woooooo! I'm a man of independent means and modern wealth You are my favorite Genotype We go on, We go on to the breeding ground Just like a salmon the stream You are my favorite Genotype Just like a salmon exploding! We go on, We go on to the breeding ground Are my favorite Genotype Are you like a salmon in the stream? Oooo, oooooooo! I like to fall down Ehhhhhrrrrr Woooooo!
16.
Brillo 01:28
Are the animal x8 Ayiyiyi Are the animal OooooohWoooooo! Are the animal Huuuuh! Are the animal Uh uh uh! Are the animal Ehhhhhh! Are the animal Wowowowo Are the animal Uh, uh Are the animal, the animal, the animal Hey, ya know, I ain't no animal Stuff me full of cocaine Everybody had their own supply of the paraphernelia They even had a mirror on the floor Joke told, line of coke sold AaaaaaaWoooooo! Everybody had their own supply of the paraphernelia They even had a mirror on the floor Ahoy! Toot Toot! Everybody had their own supply of the paraphernelia They even had a mirror on the floor Joke told, line of coke sold UhhhhhhhrWoooooo! Are the animal Ooooooowoooow! Are the animal Huuuuuuuuu! Oooooo...
17.
Wo wo wo! The elephants are coming out Remember, the elephants of Africa They're armed with machetes Aaah! Aaah! Send in the...ahhhhh! Follow the asshole...ahhhh! Eli ela...ahhhh! Eli ela Eli ela Eli ela Elephant! Life without, the elevator's got to go But for the explosion O o o! The elevator's has got to go The fucking elephant's head exploded uhhhhrrrr.....waaargh! ooooooooo.....aaaaaaa! Send more x13 Elephants! Wo wo! Ha ha ha!
18.
One Push 01:39
It has occurred to me, just quite recently That we are plagued, with this unsightly filth They are far too near, they give me the fear But what is to be done, what of the mess? But just One Push, a final push Rid the naughty boys of their sad condescensions A sense of strength, of military valor Will sweep away the rising tide It's easy to say, it will just go away It's not our fault, it could be worse But what if there was, just one special day? When we open our eyes, and justice is served But just One Push, a final push Rid the naughty boys of their sad condescensions A sense of strength, of military valor Will sweep away the rising tide Just One Push, a final push Rid the naughty boys of their sad condescensions
19.
Puppethead 00:41
1-2-3-4 All the little kiddie kids are doing a jiggy dance they are going to the Punch and Judy Everyone you know is going To the puppet show sponsored by cable TV Puppet Head Puppet Head Everybody jiggy dance Everybody Punch and Judy All hail to the master Puppet Head Puppet Head We are going to watch A little bit of Punch and Judy Uhhhhrr! 1-2-3-4
20.
It's an absolute moral imperative When taking the Greggy for a ride To put him in, his little special seat belt buckle Make him feel, oh!, so warm and secure inside Absolutely, positively It's an absolute moral imperative When taking the Greggy for a ride To put him in, his little special seat belt buckle Make him feel, oh!, so warm and secure inside Absolutely, positively See the bad driver gonna get on down Gone in his mind, gonna get on down See the bad driver get on down Gone in his mind gonna get on down Waaaaarghghghgh
21.
Spy Plane 00:40
1-2-3-4 Eh eya eya! Climb, it dives! X3 I spy a spy plane, eya eya! I spy a spy plane, eya eya! It hovers round It hovers round Climb, it dives! X3 I spy a spy plane, eya eya! I spy a spy plane, eya eya! It hovers round It hovers round 1-2-3-4
22.
Big bad Kathryn Brandt why are you trying to kill the workers? You loving son Brian Wanna be gangster, gets in trouble You will find out Work and Family do not mix You will find out Work and Family do not mix oooo oooo oooo oooo oooo oooo oooo oooo Big bad Kathryn Brandt why are you trying to kill the workers? You loving son Brian Wanna be gangster, gets in trouble You will find out Work and Family do not mix You will find out Work and Family do not mix I declare a war I declare a civil war Against all failure Work and Family All bad things Big Bad Big Bad Big Bad Big Bad Big Bad Big Bad Big Bad wwwwoooow!
23.
Lumber 01:03
Oh, I went to visit fi ri rattlebrain I yelled right out are ya from Wisconsin Oh! That's ok I went to visit Kali in a fi ri rattlebrain You see, I've got the same kind of enemies Both north and south I went to visit Kali in a fi ri rattlebrain Northern Wisconsin You see, the trees, they go down the river And the twigs and branches go down the stream It's like the hand of a giant god You can push me down the river But you cannot push me around Oh, you're really in a fi ri rattlebrain Killed right out In northern Wisconsin, oh, that's ok Rattle Rattle Brain! I Love that Brain! Rattle That Brain Aaaaaaa! Aaaaaaa!
24.
Tickle Time 00:54
Gilgamesh he got a good price Oh Pompeii let's scream delight A bitty and a bally good price All they got were souveneirs That they use for rabbit ears Mommy boy and Tickle Time I wanna shout Where you gonna hide When the rabbit comes out I'm really in the Fire with the Fear And now we come to Tickle Time Ohhhhhh Nooooo Tickle Time! Now that I know Girlfriend is yours I can't hold, my mind Ohhhhh Nooooo Waaaaaa! The Terran Federation Bans the use of Tickle Time Run it to the ground Tickle Tickle! The Terran Federation Bans the use of Tickle Time He's rolling on the ground Tickle Tickle!
25.
It was a hard, vicious night Me and Sgt. Tilly were trying to make it back to Base 4 We were making our way across the wastelands of central Wisconsin Trying to hop trains, when... Jumping trains, running down that world that was to the world that would a be A Tilly on a top This is where my mind explodes Jumping trains, running down to that world that was to the world that would a be A Tilly on a top, the can's a place where still they cancel all the discipline he ha! Here we are, trapped at the little switching station The took us out, and beat us with paddles Sgt. Tilly was a far cry sad that we had come to this sad conclusion Oh Mercy They started us off with the little bitty chores Then they tried to work us up to the Leg Bite Leg Bite, silly old thing Part of the kill that'll feel too good and I find I'll fight for the world that would a be Jumping dead on a train to that world that was to the world that would a be A Tilly on a top, Now this is where my mind exploded Jumping dead on a train to that world that was to the world that would a be A Tilly on a top, In your mind, all the old liquor lady ideal leads to bad discipline Ya Ya Ya Ya Ya! Ya Ya Ya Ya Ya Ya Ya... It was a hard, vicious experience but it was character forming We escaped from the base And we hitched another train In our long, futile attempt to reach Base 4 Can you hear me? I'm out here in central Wisconsin
26.
Fly Cry 00:42
Ai Ai! Ai Ai! Fly Cry Ultimate test Ultimate test of cerebral fitness I'm gonna fucking make you fly And you'll cry hard Whoooooo! Ai Ai! Wowowo Wowowo Wowowo Uhuhuhuh Uhuhuhuh Uhuhuhuh Uhuhuhuh Fly Cry Ultimate test Ultimate test of cerebral fitness
27.
Huffing 00:48
My brain laughs to death I can't go to waste So nice and lovely Like a taste pussy What say this old draught When my conkle shout So nice and so lovely Like a tasty pussy Hufffff Hufffff Hufffff Hufffff So nice and so lovely Like a tasty pussy I can't go to fate I can't go to waste Like a concentrate Like a taste pussy I can't go to waste I can't go to fate
28.
Talk to me, can you see? You better have a little bit of fight I don't know when your girlfriend tells me It feels so good It's not that I don't wanna You're not gonna fight I asked her to come back home It's only natural Uhhhhhr! Uhhhr! It's only natural Aaaaaah! Aaaaaah!
29.
Kitty Pig 00:34
Kitty Pig Kitty Pig Kitty Pig Pig Kitty Pig Kitty Pig Kitty Kitty Kitty Pig Kitty Kitty Pig Kitty Pig Pig Pig Kitty Pig Kitty Pig Kitty Kitty Kitty uhrrrrrh! Right now The earthside policy Safe on Sunday, looking fucked Oh, were do you think you'll go When you try to grab your giddy up giddy oh Kitty is a Pig, Kitty is a perfect time to beeeeeeeee!
30.
In my room, in my chair No escape, no way out Where o where o where o where o where o where o where o where o where You know why, you can't come I maintain I just ate part of your brain I just ate part of your brain I kill prey, I had a crazy old little time The sunside Prussian While inside prothesyze Evil, evil man Little piggy boy It put's up with Hurrah Hurrah Hurrah! You know why You know why You know why You know why You know why You know why, In my Room No escape, no way out I know I'm More than Kittens Yeah! You know why, More than Kittens
31.
Pig Jig 01:09
You call yourself a Pig Jig Oh Well, Oh Well, how about you? Some of you'd best stop, look, listen, and laugh Or beware, you'll be Pig Jigged too Silly Putty Pig Jig The glory of the space age jitterbug Silly Putty Pig Jig How long do you expect this to go? You call me the Pig Jig Oh Well, Oh Well, how about you? Some of you'd best stop, look, listen, and laugh Or beware, you'll be Pig Jigged too Aaaaaah! Aaaaaah! Aaaaaah! Aaaaaah! Silly Putty Pig Jig The glory of the space age jitterbug Silly Putty Pig Jig How long do you expect this to go? Pig Jig! Aha!
32.
Eel Mountain 00:51
Who Knows the secret of Eel Mountain Who Knows the secret of Eel Mountain A Mountain of lamprey eels, who can control all our beleaguered cowering mates It was the last thing we wanted. we were friends with the eels they guarded our children and protected the bay Then Fisherman Cracker, cursed be his name spoiled the sacred waters, spoiled the sacred lane They boiled out of the water, fought us hand to hand, when they took over the mountain, they controlled the land.
33.
Captain Cookers, Electric Hookers Give it a while, give it a while Captain Cookers, Electric Hookers Give it a while, give it a while Captain give you break in life take you on a merry life Everyone is so impressed Saw a lot of boring mess Captain Cookers, Electric Hookers Give it a while, give it a while Take me! Take me! Take me! Chuck me! Ak! And if left the cow with would that to be would be ok Captain Cookers, Electric Hookers Give it a while, give it a while
34.
Iron Command 00:52
We were moving through a land of fog North of Italy, born of the land Drove through the Iron and South to Hazard Strike All great forms of healing We drove through a land of Pandas I march for the victor I pray for an action We are ruling with Madmen We are Prisoners Of the Iron Command Of the Iron Command When, I change, the Panda mood And relax, and bittumen And idle bittimus Some said, sofa, some stuff Keep a little belly safe Knowing in the pallindrome Holly of the molly day You Pooly in the polly do
35.
Listen, I am the master of all time I cannot give a shit, listen, it was given without a thought to a crime But with the embrace of my arm I can protect you In my cloak of evil Because of my magnificent powers You will know spite, burn! See, I haven't got the clutch What are you forgetting Doc Doctor? See, I have a rotten clutch What are you forgetting Doc Doctor? Time, Display I'll bet you'll try to get away Time, Display I'll bet you'll try to get away See, I am master of all time Time, Display I'll bet you'll try to get away Time, Display I'll bet you'll try to get away
36.
When you see the Grand Marshall You'd better look him in the eye For if you need a special favor There's 200 values left to try Ooooooooooooooooo Ohhhhhhh! Ohhhhhh! Ohhhhhh! Ohhhhhhhhhh! When you see the Grand Marshall You'd better look him in the eye For if you need a special favor There's 200 valued ways to try Smile together! Look chubby! Grand Marshall Grand Marshall Grand Marshall Grand Marshall Grand Marshall Aaaaaaaaaaaah! Grand Marshall Grand Marshall Grand Marshall Aaaaaaaaaaaah! Grand Marshall, uh! Yuh
37.
Xerobot 00:56
He he! Here's Xerobot, just a little little little bot Lacking time, has no purpose How many of the other robots struggle with his sheer disservice These robots just hang around They do not want a second chance Xerobot, robot without a purpose No robot, No robot Xerobot, robot without a purpose No robot, No robot Here's Xerobot, just a little little little bot Trapped in time, has no purpose One of the other ugly robots said that it would give disservice These robots just hang around They do not want a second chance These kind of robots do not want a second chance Xerobot, robot without a purpose Ahhhhhr! There was a little robot Trrrrrriiiiil!

about

The mid-90s in Madison, Wisconsin wasn’t necessarily the best time to be a band like Xerobot, but thank the gods that they decided to become one. Spastic, hyperactive scrawl evoking the original New York No Wave scene, Xerobot’s recorded output consisted of a CD, a couple split singles and a handful of comp appearances. This self titled LP assembles 37 tracks in almost as many minutes and collects all their releases and even additional unreleased material. This LP was mastered by Weasel Walter and includes a 20pp booklet featuring photos, first person accounts of the band and lyrics! First edition of 180 copies.

Scott Bonneville: I never knew them to vary the hierarchy of those three sonic components– the skronk guitar, the lurching machine rhythms, Greg’s squeal-howling -- and they executed them as though it were a grim duty. I never knew whether I was feeling excitement or respect. They didn't pander or compromise.

Sarah Hennies: I’m glad someone remembers it - there was so much great music that happened right on the cusp of the internet becoming a thing. The obscure, weird bands that broke up before digital music really took off have often been lost in the shuffle of history and I think it’s never a bad idea to introduce people to a bizarre little slice of history. It doesn’t surprise me at all, I’ve never seen another band like them.

Weasel Walter: Xerobot was an extremely tight band and they blew people away by executing their somewhat complex material with a lot of vigor and control. Greg certainly was the wild card and the rest of the band seemed to react with a range of bemusement and/or disgust at his antics and spontaneous in-between song banter.

credits

released March 15, 2021

Tracks 1-22: Control Panel CD, Coat-Tail Records
Track 23: Second Sixty Second Compilation, Coat-Tail Records
Tracks 24-25: Duotron/Xerobot split 7", Coat-Tail Records
Tracks 26-28: Melt Banana/Xerobot split 5", Coat-Tail Records
Track 29: Previously unreleased
Track 30: The Money Shot compliation, Chunklet Industries
Tracks 31-37: Previously Unreleased

Tracks 1-23: Recorded by Eric Brusewitz, Madison, WI 1996
Tracks 24-25: Recorded at The Green Room, Madison, WI 1995
Tracks 26-30: Recorded by Steve Albini, Chicago, IL 1996
Tracks 31-37: Live recording, San Francisco, CA 1997

Liner notes assembled by Ethan Swan

All tracks remastered by Weasel Walter, 2020

A Chunklet Industries Release
All Rights Reserved
Manufactured and Assembled in the U.S.A.
CHKLP032

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We're All In This Together. Except you. You're a dick.

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